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Post by akanundrum on Sept 4, 2015 9:57:47 GMT -8
Male/Female...is this ever ok? |
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Post by fatfredjones on Sept 4, 2015 14:18:33 GMT -8
It's OK to notice. It's never ok to stare. Some may argue that there's no harm in looking, but I'd ask those people, what is the point in looking? We're naturally compelled to look or even stare at attractive people because its all apart of the reproduction game. If you're content with your current mate, I see no need to overtly stare.
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thickyfitt01
Female
Posts: 59 
Relationship: Single Not Looking
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Post by thickyfitt01 on Sept 5, 2015 4:25:01 GMT -8
LMAO! That video is so harilious to me probably because it's true for me. I've been on both sides (being with a man that couldn't stop staring and being the woman looked at by guys with their girlfriend) and it's not fun.
My ex was a Looky Lou who could not keep his eyeballs to himself and would go as far as to call it out to me like I was his homeboy! I often wondered if he was happy with my appearance, why did he even need to stare, let alone look. The relationship did end because I couldn't take how I felt in the response to his staring once I gained weight and my self esteem dropped.
After the breakup, I remember being out shopping(and feeling HUGE lol) and I got the feeling that someone was watching me. I turned around and saw this fione brother just staring! Lol he was so busying watching me that he didn't notice his girlfriend staring at him!! That situation made me realize that men will always look, but a man that really cares for you will not stare and still make you feel like you're the only woman he sees.
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Post by darlingnikkih on Sept 5, 2015 9:17:38 GMT -8
It is natural to look. It is also immature to think that once you're with someone that they will no longer find other women/men attractive. I know full well that Halle Berry isn't the only woman my husband finds attractive aside from me lol. We are open and honest with one another about everything and yes, sometimes the truth hurts I would rather him tell me then lie to my face. I know that a bigger booty, longer hair, smoother skin, taller, prettier woman is always out there but there is a big difference between love and lust. My husband loves me and wouldn't risk our marriage for anything. He can look all he wants and will never touch because he treats me like a Queen and everyday in every way he assures and reassures me that no one can replace me.
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Post by briitski on Sept 15, 2015 17:04:57 GMT -8
Everybody looks, whether its in front of their partner or not. It's how we're designed. We should be in control of our ego and know our value. We should be in a place where a glance from our partner does not make us feel inferior. And we shouldn't have to question our partner's intentions. If we truly love ourselves, and can give the same unconditional love to our partner, there would be no need for doubts.
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kesco
Male
Searching for my muse
Posts: 121 
Relationship: Single Not Looking
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Post by kesco on Sept 15, 2015 21:12:06 GMT -8
Look but don't stare. There is no need to make your partner feel insecure.
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Post by awakewhileusleep on Sept 18, 2015 15:44:20 GMT -8
i agree with the comments above, but ultimately you have to know your partner... there are certain sacrifices and compromises you should make for someone you love. if you know that they are jealous or have issues with insecurity, put blockers on your peripherals to shorten something that caught ur attention to a glance. staring is just rude anyway, unless you are with someone who is sure of themselves that you can joke around with
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Post by sunshine on Sept 18, 2015 19:40:31 GMT -8
Honestly the only time it bothered me was when my self esteem was low.
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Post by justpeachy on Sept 19, 2015 21:38:44 GMT -8
I'm in agreement with look but don't stare and for those who may have sensitive spouses pay attention to how many times your looking as well.
This has me thinking when i was in the car with my younger brother driving (2.5 years younger) and I'm casually looking at passerby's when I guess someone caught my attention and I must have looked a second or two longer than usual.
He told me how that incident could infringe on his manhood because they don't know that we're related and it appears that I am somehow disrespecting him by looking too long or a certain way. I never forgot that and I would hope this rule applies to men treating their ladies with the same amount of respect.
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