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Post by ria85 on Sept 14, 2015 3:10:57 GMT -8
Yes, yes, I know this is the age old question right? Well for me, I am very serious. I will just give a little insight as to myself and background and hopefully that will explain why this simple question has me stumped.
The Basics: I am 30 years old. I have my B.A. in Biochem. I am an analytical chemist (and working on becoming an analytical biologist as my side hustle). I have 2 daughters, 4 and 11. I got my degree a little over 3 years ago after going through some rough years. I moved away from home due to a job opportunity and a safer environment for my children. I moved to a place that is 2-2.5 hours from home. I have no family or real friends here. I have a few co-workers that I occasionally get together with but nothing deep. Not to toot my own horn but I am very old school pretty. By that I mean Im more the 1990s type of girl than this new age bundles and face beat type of woman. Im not rolling in the dough but I mange to care for my children and myself without a problem.
The problem: Literally WHERE do I find a man? As I said, I have no family or friends here so the "hey I know someone you might like method is kind of a bust. I work at a pharmaceutical company so most of the people are non-Black and I only date Black men. The few Black men that are here are married or have their heads so far up their you know whats because they have "made" it and somehow feel they are Gods among men. Besides work, I go to my youngest daughters daycare and home. I live in a decent area so when I go to the grocery store or post office (yea like who goes there anymore right lol), Im sure some of the men are within what I am looking for. I really hate to think it is my kids but even if it is, I know a lot of women with previous kids who are married so that doesnt wipe out the entire rooster right? Has anyone found luck with dating groups or sites?
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Post by akanundrum on Sept 14, 2015 6:14:17 GMT -8
This is exactly why I created this site. It's still new and I've done very little marketing this far because it was important for me that everything work correctly and I've got it filled in before I put a decent amount of money behind promoting it. But trust me, I'm putting a tremendous amount of work into it.
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Post by akanundrum on Sept 14, 2015 6:16:40 GMT -8
And have you added a post in the "find your Queen" section?
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kesco
Male
Searching for my muse
Posts: 121 
Relationship: Single Not Looking
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Post by kesco on Sept 14, 2015 6:27:43 GMT -8
It seems that your social activity is very limited. These days it is not very common for a man to want to approach a woman in the store or daycare. So as a man allow me to ask you a serious question.... What do you do in your spare time? Do you ever go out? If so, do you go alone or in a group? This site may have exactly what you are looking for, but I believe you may need to expound a bit more..
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Post by ria85 on Sept 14, 2015 14:16:04 GMT -8
I haven't tried the site here... IDKY but online dating is something I just haven't really seen myself doing. I do other things. I play pool on a league but the men are either married or literally like 65. I love to go dancing but because it mimics the club s end as well as nostalgic date night, men are either there with their wives or girlfriends or looking g for a quick hook up
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kesco
Male
Searching for my muse
Posts: 121
Relationship: Single Not Looking
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Post by kesco on Sept 14, 2015 18:13:21 GMT -8
I haven't tried the site here... IDKY but online dating is something I just haven't really seen myself doing. I do other things. I play pool on a league but the men are either married or literally like 65. I love to go dancing but because it mimics the club s end as well as nostalgic date night, men are either there with their wives or girlfriends or looking g for a quick hook up Lets start with what type of person you are looking for... Are you truly putting yourself in an enviroment to be available to meet such a man? |
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Post by ria85 on Sept 15, 2015 10:29:07 GMT -8
Not at all. That is my "chicken or the egg" problem. I can't be around like people because I don't know where they are because I don't know anyone here. I don't know anyone here because I don't know where to go to meet like people.
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kesco
Male
Searching for my muse
Posts: 121
Relationship: Single Not Looking
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Post by kesco on Sept 15, 2015 10:30:59 GMT -8
Not at all. That is my "chicken or the egg" problem. I can't be around like people because I don't know where they are because I don't know anyone here. I don't know anyone here because I don't know where to go to meet like people. So what do you enjoy doing? Besides whats already stated? What are your interest? |
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Post by ria85 on Sept 20, 2015 11:11:59 GMT -8
I enjoy off beat environments... Wine and paints, paintball, drive in movies, museums, almost anything to do with food lol one day cooking workshops, ethnic festivals, cooking at home. I enjoy music a lot. I love sharing all of these things with my children. I like to read but haven't read a book recently. I'm in the process of trying to open a business so that limits me going out even more.
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kesco
Male
Searching for my muse
Posts: 121
Relationship: Single Not Looking
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Post by kesco on Sept 20, 2015 13:38:44 GMT -8
I enjoy off beat environments... Wine and paints, paintball, drive in movies, museums, almost anything to do with food lol one day cooking workshops, ethnic festivals, cooking at home. I enjoy music a lot. I love sharing all of these things with my children. I like to read but haven't read a book recently. I'm in the process of trying to open a business so that limits me going out even more. It seems like a music festival or any lounge where they play live music would be the perfect venue for you to find that special person. |
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callmemansa83
Male
~Thuglife~
Posts: 171
Relationship: Single Not Looking
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Post by callmemansa83 on Sept 28, 2015 20:17:34 GMT -8
Let your kids be your dating guides...
Not literally but I'm sure anything you do revolving around them
For example
-Going to the park together
-Taking a painting class with them...
-Dance class with them...
Basically anywhere you would spend time with your children is your best bet for finding a like minded single man...
It isn't guaranteed but it's a option and worst case scenario you don't meet anyone but still have fun with your kids... (Which is still time well spent)
They will be able to help you filter out the goonies too... Body language speaks volumes especially in children...
Pay attention to the signs, meditate and keep your vibrations high queen...
Power to you ria85...
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Post by ria85 on Sept 29, 2015 4:28:55 GMT -8
Let your kids be your dating guides...
Not literally but I'm sure anything you do revolving around them
For example
-Going to the park together
-Taking a painting class with them...
-Dance class with them...
Basically anywhere you would spend time with your children is your best bet for finding a like minded single man...
It isn't guaranteed but it's a option and worst case scenario you don't meet anyone but still have fun with your kids... (Which is still time well spent)
They will be able to help you filter out the goonies too... Body language speaks volumes especially in children...
Pay attention to the signs, meditate and keep your vibrations high queen...
Power to you ria85...
Thank you for the advice. Only thing is that I do a lot with my kids. I just didnt include that in the things that I do. Its just most places dont have a good selection of decent Black men and the ones that are present are either married or committed.
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callmemansa83
Male
~Thuglife~
Posts: 171
Relationship: Single Not Looking
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Post by callmemansa83 on Sept 29, 2015 7:04:25 GMT -8
I should have included "do things outside of your norm with them"... Try new things you will meet new people... Sorry your not getting too much help in your situation... Worst case scenario your just going to have to move again... Seems like you moved into a dead part of the state...
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